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Recently a mature, godly woman asked me how she should disciple someone. She had been attending a wonderful church for many years but realized she had never really been taught how to disciple. Here are a few thoughts.

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Discipleship is loving someone into loving God so they can become more like Christ.

Discipleship is a relationship not a program. It requires intentional time, patience, and genuine care.

First and foremost, discipling others flows out of your own discipleship to Christ.

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Here are some guiding principles to help you prioritize what to focus on and how to approach discipling others.

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The 6 Guiding Principles of Discipleship

Think of these principles as invitations on how to live a life of flourishing.

1. Pursue presence.

God is the source of all, especially your life and your power to overcome sin. The more you abide in God, the more you will become like Him. Seek continual conversation with the Spirit. Continually have communion with Christ.

Meditate, memorize, and study the Bible and hide it deeply in your heart. Seek the truth in all things.

Sin disconnects us from ourselves and our values. The more present you are, the more you are able to think, love, and live well. Presence is fundamental to experiencing all forms of virtue and flourishing. From intimacy, creativity, patience, goodness, contentment, and self-control: deep presence is essential.

2. Joyfully surrender.

Seek to live in a state of surrender to God and His will for your life. Aim only to know and do God’s will with love.

Help each other surrender spiritual strongholds to God and pursue virtue as they follow God’s guidance. Surrender to others in humility so that you might not be a stumbling block to their experiencing God.

3. Intentionally reflect.

Ask questions to deepen reflection and surrender their will and life to God. Learning head knowledge is never enough. A discipleship community helps you apply the truth to your own life. Embrace slowness, stillness, and silence to empower your reflection practice.

Study and learn together with curiosity. Your best thinking comes from God. Your ideas are incredibly important and need to be taken very seriously. Study, repeat, and reflect on God’s truths and how they can be carried out in your life. Learn and remember new ideas so you can experience a better way of living.

4. Embodied worship.

Our bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit, and as embodied spirits we are to take care of our bodies. We were intentionally created with physical bodies and should not ignore that fact. Worship should not exclusively exist in the spiritual realm but in the physical, so honor God with your body in every imaginable way. Discipleship extends to the entire human experience, from pursuing physical health and prioritizing movement, to caring for the environment, and stewarding the time, energy, skills, objects, assets, and resources that God has entrusted to you.

God is a creator and invites you to follow Him as a creator in his Kingdom. Pursue excellence in your work, make work your craft. Whether your focus is on parenting or advancing your career, work with excellence in a way that honors the Lord. With gratitude and responsibility, care for the physical world you live in and everything in it. Prioritize creating and experiencing beauty.

5. Courageously connect.

Connect often. Pray together to connect to God and His power. Connect with others with curiosity. Choose vulnerability, for it is the strength of all trusting relationships.

Give and receive confession of your sins and strongholds to God and those in your discipleship community, and to those you have harmed as soon as you discover them. Focusing first on honesty through confession and engaging skilled discipleship will weaken selfishness, dishonesty, isolation, and fear.

Pursue mastery in how you listen, speak, and love others. The deeper the connection, the more you reflect God’s love. Be trustworthy, reliable, and forgiving. Listen deeply and give guidance for how to follow God. Focus on growing in practicing the skills of the spiritual disciplines alone and together so you can experience God’s transforming love and power.

6. Generously serve.

Make the purpose of your days to serve others. The more you focus on loving and serving others with generosity, the more your life will take on meaning and the more resilient you will become.

Become great in humble service. Pursue mastery in serving and discipling others to love and follow Christ. Great service comes through great sacrifice. Pursue discipline and simplicity to free yourself to serve.

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Meet together. Ask questions. Listen deeply. Pray. Make love your aim.

Quotes

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Henri Nouwen, Finding My Way Home​

Jon Tyson, A Creative Minority​

Matthew 28:18-20

Questions

To what degree is making disciples a priority in your life?

Tell me the story of your spiritual journey. When did you come to know God and His love?

How did you experience God's love, or not experience His love, in your family life growing up as a child?

How is God guiding you in this season?

What questions are you asking God?

(Use these questions as journal prompts and to guide your prayers this week.)

Endnote

Apprentice to Jesus. Become like your Master through making disciples. Grow God's Kingdom of love.

Live wisely,

Josh

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